“I’m thinking of buying a monkey. Then I think, “Why stop at one?” I don’t like being limited in that way. Therefore, I’m considering a platoon of monkeys. So that people will look at me and see how mellow and well-adjusted I am compared to these monkeys throwing their faeces around.”—RDJ c. 2005 (via fuckyeahrdj) (via cathcannotfly) (via godiseven) (via apiphile)
Day 10 – What do you think about straightxedge?
i think i want people to do what they goddamned want to?
Day 11 – What do you think about prostitution? Should it be legal?
uh, hi, not only should it be legal, but given a chance i’m voting for the actual fucking hanging of people who beat the shit out of and rape prostitutes. jesus. wtf is wrong with you people.
oh, i’m sorry! i must’ve missed the part where it said i had ANY FUCKING right whatsoever to even vaguely CONSIDER telling a woman what to do with her body or whatever fetus is inside it! what’s that, y’say? i’m also allowed to VOTE on this?
(my opinion does not fucking MATTER and let me just assure you right fucking NOW, NEITHER DOES YOURS. HER opinion matters on whether or not SHE wants to give birth. MY opinion matters on whether or not I want to give birth. YOUR ASS can stay OUT of it until YOU get knocked up yourself, and then you too CAN MAKE YOUR OWN DAMN DECISIONS BUT BY DEAD GODS NO ONE ELSE’S.)
Day 8 – Do you think any drugs should be legalized? Do you think there should be an age for drinking?
uh, yeah, and no. here’s why: laws? don’t stop anybody from drugs or drinking. all, and i mean absolutely all, drug laws do is end up with slobbery drunk teenagers in jail and people who got caught with the only joint they ever intended to smoke in their life in federal prison. people end up being murdered. billions of fucking dollars are spent throwing people in prison.
the whole ‘war against drugs’ thing? it’s not working, is it? no! no, it’s MAKING EVERYTHING WORSE. fuckwits.
Day 7 – Do you want to get married and/or have kids?
…no. i mean. NO. i do not fucking want to get married.
(now granted, my body would prefer i had children. my body seems to think that if i do not have a baby i will die. my body wishes all the people it knew would stop getting hospitalized every few months for girly-bit surgeries on hutcheson’s fourth floor, which is labour & delivery, because it is one day going to tear to shreds the soul i may but more likely may not possess. my body has forgotten that it is worthless, and that my brain is almost as bad, and that my own girl-junk is dysfunctional at absolute best. *dry*)
Day 6 – What are your views on love? Do you think it’s real? Do you think we only experience one love per lifetime? Does everyone have a soul mate?
love is fuckmazing. love is wretched and stupid and miserable and exultant and FUCKMAZING and annoying as shit. it’s—uh, as real as any other human function? i am deeply annoyed that you would suggest it can only be experienced once! because it is what it is, it can and probably even should be experienced as often as possible, towards as many people as possible. at once, even. EXPLOSION OF LOVE. it’s a good idea.
oh. and the very term and concept of ‘soul mate’ has me making a face that resembles the face you make when you’ve just drank an entire bottle of lemon juice.
well, heeeere’s the thing: i’m gay. i’m allowed an opinion on my marriage, which is that if i desire to be married for some reason such as a rapid descent into madness, then i damn well should be able to and if you try to stop me i might beat you with my crutches on the very principle of the thing. if YOU are not gay, then you are still ALLOWED an opinion on gay marriage although i will be inclined to suggest that you might possibly be bugfuck crazy if your opinion is something even like “oh i love gays! my best friends are gays! but i don’t think marriage, y’know, it’s not, it’s not traditonal, and anyway why do you guys want marriage?*”, but it should not be an opinion that counts for very much when it comes to politics, for instance.
so basically, don’t ask me what my views on gay marriage are. it’s not a thing where there should be VIEWS. for fuck’s sake.
*because you have it. and i don’t. and i disagree with all marriage, but this is not fucking ABOUT marriage, it’s about bigotry and terrified white christians with money pouring from their ears gone wild. if one group of people is allowed it so freely, it’s blatantly hideous and wrong to tell another group that they’re just not good enough for your goddamned vegas chapels.
Day 3 – Are you proud to be from whatever country you are from?
er. i’m not ashamed? but i don’t get attached to things like country or state or city or even house, honestly. pencils and this coffee mug and that hairbrush, sure, i develop Relationships with them. countries etc., yeah er whatever. so i’m not proud, either. i am wholly apathetic. i just don’t care, dudes.
the touchy tumblr-is-going-to-fight challenge: day 1
i am compelled to do this meme by an uncontrollable desire to be constantly offensive to SOMEONE and also, er, to post original content on this bastard. ahem.
Day 1 – Do you believe in God?/What religion are you?
ahahaha oh hell. my god is not your god (none of my gods are your gods actually! except for the ones that ARE, of course!), the capitalisation and therefore assumption of christianity is weird, and it is very safe to assume that my religion? is not actually one you’ve ever heard of. =D
Did you hear the ‘59 sound coming through on Grandmama’s radio? Did you hear the rattling chains in the hospital walls? Did you hear the old gospel choir when they came to carry you over? Did you hear your favorite song one last time?